Friday, January 19, 2007


Okay my curly-haired-Caramel- freind just pointed out that one can not be lovingly forgotten.
Okay, what i meant was:

Would you rather be forgotten or hatefully remembered?


Would you rather be hatefully remembered or lovingly forgotten?

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Day one. ummm.

Last night i slept funny, so my elbow isn't bending. Its just in an 'L' . But i've resloved to blog. Could barely figure all this out but i must blog. This year. (i'm so naively excited!!)

My colleauge (howeveritisspelled) just dropped in to say that she is on leave for the next week so could i count the stock before she goes? She's off to the coast...sun, sand., SKY! I'm jealous but i smile anyway, she is a really nice girl. (Pause) I decide to approximate.--Hey, its home time and im the only one in my square...partitioned -desk thing.

You have no idea how long it took me to pick this theme, this template, this colour. I'm really indecisive. You should see me at restaurants--I get anxiety when the waiter comes. It's just that as soon as i kow what i want, and its all down in his notebook, I see something better...or i think about it and realise my tongue doesn't fancy fish...the taste maybe, but not the texture. Sure--the salad is an ideal choice --looks juicy and colourful but i like how the fries smell. It's all relative. but strangely i can be stubborn, when it suits me.

Anyhow, i'm 26 years old but i like to project by like 2 years so when im finally that age its a sweet surprise. So im 28.

I always thought at 28 i'd be tall and slender, you know aunty-like : decided, know what i want, funny, slightly impish and fun, yet delicate like my Auntie Lucy. Also i'd work--Maybe a dancer, Definately into the environment. But guess what? im still the same person i was. And i love that i am!

Me: Offbeat, alittle boy-ish, loud around freinds, quiet in crowds. Driven, big-eyed with my rather pudgy nose and plump lips. That is the Bantu in me. Someone once told me my eyes will remain like those of a child even when i'm fifty. An inquisitive glare he called it. (I damn hope so. Im freaked out about ageing.) I have my daddy's hands i think thats my favorite part of me. I dream to be an artist, i try to paint, poetry, write scripts. One of my redeeming qualities is that i KNOW I CAN NOT SING.

Anyway enough about me. On the first day anyway.

love that i am doing this.